Belize Part 2: Jungle Tales of Sweat and Vom

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Monday, March 9 – A morning nature walk from Hell and a day where I learned to trust my instincts. I am a former girl scout, so a nature walk is not a totally foreign concept to me. Although, at this point I was still kind of nursing a sprained ankle and also recovering from some pretty sick sun burns. Despite my adversities, I decided to (*cough* PEER PRESSURE!) follow the crowd, put on my long pants and long sleeve shirt, and follow the drunken native who was leading us into the jungle at 7AM. We didn't get to eat breakfast and I only had one bottle of water on me. I was sweating balls from the long clothes I was in as we walked the dusty dirt paths, trying to ration my water out despite the heat-induced hallucinations. Look at the picture your left. Don't I look hot?!


Eventually we turned into the jungle, our fearless leader using a machete to cut a path for us while the rest of us tripped on vines and branches. When it became apparent that our leader was lost I was PISSED – skin burning, about to pass out from hunger and thirst, no interesting wild life to be seen…..Worst nature walk ever. Moreover he gave everyone this roasted coconut and after everyone stuffed themselves with it out of weakness and possibly fear (he was holding a large ass knife after all) revealed it was a laxative. 

Obviously since I'm writing this, the story reached some sort of happy ending where I reached the beach again and returned to paradise. But I learned my lesson – sleep in and let everyone else explore the 'nature.' 

That evening there was a camp fire with stories told by the same guy that led the walk. It was basically unintelligible and awkward. He was slurring words and spitting as he repeated random phrases and noises. I sat in the sand and suppressed giggles that were more difficult to suppress because of the 'reef juice' I had consumed before dinner and took the first way out of the situation i could find.

Tuesday, March 10our second diving day – 2 dives outside of the reef pretty close to the resort we were staying at. To say it was rocky would be a huge understatement. This 'drift' type dive definitely tested my limits. You try putting on 50 pounds of gear while riding on a bucking ship, never being able to find any sort of equilibrium. The dives themselves were gorgeous. The reef at Belize (2nd largest barrier reef, and number 1 in terms of condition) were fantastic. It was just sucky being at the surface, waiting for the boat while large waves crashed over my head. I feel like surfacing is already sort of disorienting (I would compare it to birth, but that feels way too melodramatic), and the rough water just made the process a bit more traumatic. 

Being in the boat after the second dive really made me want to vom. After shouting "OMG, I'm going to Vom" for like 10 minutes, pissing off fellow passengers, it wasn't me who ended up doing the deed. I clung for my life as the boat made 10 foot drops going through the channel, all the while keeping in my cookies (or more accurately, tortilla chips). I made it back, but definitely felt like balls the rest of the day. 

But, when life gives you feeling like balls, I give life alcohol. A mojito later and some BBQ ribs at a full moon party down the beach and I was doing just fine. 

Tune in tomorrow for tales of how I spent my days, beach friends, and more diving! 
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